Saturday, April 16, 2011

There's a tear in my beer

Hey, y'all:


Somethin' awful happened last month, an' I'm just now ready tuh talk about it.


Mom an' my cousins an' their friend, Kate an' Holden all went out tuh my Oncle Charlie's (mom's brother) house tuh go shootin'. Sounds like a real good time, huh?


Now.....buhfore y'all start screamin' 'bout gun control, know this:




I DON'T WANNA HEAR YER PINKO COMMIE CRYIN'!!!!! IF YA DON'T LIKE GUNS, GO VISIT SOME TREE-HUGGIN' HIPPY BLOG!!!!!!!!!







Okay....ahem......I feel better now. So anyways, when I heard mom talkin' 'bout this shootin' expedition, I was all fired up an' ready tuh go!


Read up on all the latest in my Gun World magazine......




Got out my hat an' loaded up on ammo......






Well lemme tell ya. It wuz all fer NOTHIN'. Mom an' them kids ran off like rats off a sinkin' ship an' LEFT me. Look at 'em.....havin' fun an' whatnot.










Sniff. Oh, well. I woulda just had tuh listen tuh her boring gun safety lecture, anyways. But tell me, y'all......have ya ever heard a sadder story in all yer born days?





Yep. (Sniff, muffled sob) Mmhmm.

13 comments:

dw said...

Aww, Hank, I'm sorry you were left behind. I'm not a gun fan (I know, I know, but visit a hippy blog? really? seriously? I have hugged trees, btw) but for you to be left out of all the fun? That just doesn't seem right! But don't cry in your beer -- it just waters it down and ruins the taste anyway. What did you do when they were gone? Me? I would have raided the fridge, to be sure! No opposable thumbs, you say? There are ways, my friend, to open the fridge without thumbs! :)

Chicas Libelulas said...

Hola Hank!!
Ohh how could they leave you there!! THey having all the Fun without the most important person you of course!! I hope you did raid the fridge, the pantry and the garbage!! Hope you still have a great weekend, next time come on over will have a margarita party wile they are away!
Bechos
Spongy & Licky

Sequoia & Petunia said...

Oh Hank you look really sad sitting there at the door with your ammo and no place to go shooting with it. Maybe next time huh.

hugs
S&P

Salinger The Pug said...

Poor Hank!!! OMG...this is jest TURRIBLE!

I hear mom and Holden talking about "shooting lessons" and "Don's Guns" quite a bit, so I'll try and do some more recon work and let you know when this is going to go down so you can plan ahead and stow away in the back of the Subaru. I'll meet you there and we'll just have to play the "adorable Pug" card so Ol' Don will let us in to the range.

This will totally work....what could go wrong, dude???

Love,
S-Dog

Winston, Kizzy and Tika of Two Cats and a Pug said...

OMP WHAT THE @#!*.... leaving you behind after all that readings and preparings you dids!!!!! How sad for yous. As for the gun law thingy it ain't likes they are running arounds with stockings over their faces entering banks... It is a wide open shooting range with safety and missing one super sad PUG!!!

Buddy, I feel for yous I really do.

Winston

kjpugs said...

OMG poor Hanklin! I hope you really mussed up the house while tey were gone!!!! Sounds like they had fun though!

Stella, Gunther and Macaroni said...

Hanklin! I don't even know where to begin. Personally, I think the whole stinkin' clan is just intimidated by your shooting skills. Damn shame though they just left your Pug butt behind. Hopefully you left 'em a few surprises around the house for when they got home..

I'm off to a Ted Nugent concert. Catch ya later brother.

Gunther

Tiffy said...

You sure are all fired up, Hank! I think you should run away from your peeps because clearly they don't appreciate you one bit. Take your guys and head for Texas where all the big guns are.

Tiffy

Pearl and Daisy said...

Your poor thing. Maybe you could borrow those guns yourself and go and find something to shoot! That'll teach 'em for leaving you at home. Harumph.

Pug love from,
Pearl & Daisy

Nancy Medina said...

Hanklin, this here is your good buddy Howie Pee. I'm sorry to hear about yew getting locked away when all the excitement was happenin. That's criminal I tell ya! Come on down to Texas next time and I'll show you my own brand of target practice on the leather ottoman in the living room.
Your supportive pal,
Pee Man

Yoda, Brutus & Ellie said...

Hank, dude! We can't believe your mom would do such a thing as leave you at home when there is gun shootin' planned!!

Pugs & Kisses,

Yoda, Brutus & Ellie

Archie and Melissa said...

hi hank!
oh i cannot believe they left you and then showed you pho-toes of all the fun they had!

we will have to teach them not to leave evidence behind!

tee hee!
archie poo pants

tweedles said...

How did I ever miss this one?
Its not right
its just not right for you to be left at home!
jeepers!
love
tweedles